6 Practical Ways to Strengthen Your Friendships Offline

As the colder months creep in, we must do our best to surround ourselves with love and

connection this year. It’s easy to hide under the covers and doomscroll when seasonal depression begins to move into your headspace. Every year around November, I notice my friendships begin to weaken. I’ll go months without meaningful time with people I see very frequently in the summer. We have no control over the weather. We have very little control over our phone addiction, especially as college students in the technology era. We have to make a conscious effort to preserve the physical ways we show admiration. It’s what makes us human! We have to rewrite the ideology that Snapchat is intimate.

I recently moved an hour away from my closest friends, like many of you who moved to

Wilmington. I knew when I moved that I wanted to give a strong effort to care for relationships

with my friends. This pushed me to get creative. I tried different things out to see what stuck and what was impractical. Thus, giving life to 5 Practical Ways to Strengthen Your Friendships

Offline.

1. Mail instead of text- This idea formed from my love of scrapbooking. I am always

taking home small souvenirs to put in my scrapbook; things like stickers, napkins, flyers,

postcards, hotel note pad doodles, etc. Instead of adding those trinkets to my scrapbook,

I’ll mail them in a card and write a small story about my experience. This creates a much

more special memory than sending a text. I most recently mailed my best friend a

postcard and sticker from Kairos and wrote, “This is my favorite coffee shop in

Wilmington! I love you!” When I visited her house, she had the postcard hanging on the

fridge. Every time she’s in the kitchen, she can be reminded of my love and

thoughtfulness for her. Now you’re seeing how this deepens bonds so much more than a

Snapchat! I had to mail a few cards before my friends started doing it in return, so give

others grace. Remind yourself this is for the whimsy, and don’t hold people to an

expectation to write back. However, I have found it most helpful if you simply put “write

back!” at the bottom.

Pro Tip: I buy packs of blank cards from Walmart and Goodwill. I usually spend

$3.00-$5.00 on 20 cards. Blank cards are nice to have around because you can write your

roommate a congratulations card, save time on a last-minute birthday card, or send

someone a “just thinking of you” card. If I’m hosting, I make formal invitations on blank

cards to send out.

2. Be a meaningful host- When your desire to bed rot is level extreme, ask a friend to come

over and rot with you. Cherish the quality time with your friends that college provides.

For example, once I invited all my gal pals over to watch The Bachelor. I could have lain

out some blankets and called it a day. As each guest arrived, I greeted them with a rose

and a glass of sparkling apple juice. Afterwards, we played a game where we each

“auditioned” for The Bachelor. We created sweet memories and had the opportunity to

leave the house during the winter weather.

3. Bring your friend a sweet treat- This is something a fellow communications student,

Vanessa Asher, and I started doing last year. We were very new to being friends when we

sat beside each other in class. I was grabbing coffee every day before class anyway. So,

while in line at Crimson Cup, I got her one too. I didn’t know her coffee order, so I went

basic– iced vanilla latte. I had it sitting on her side of the desk when she arrived to class.

She was so shocked by the gesture, she thought both coffees were mine and kept scooting

her coffee toward me. When I explained it was for her, we laughed, and it perfectly

broke the ice. This sparked a conversation all about coffee. This thoughtful gesture

started a small tradition of taking turns bringing coffee for one another. This grew into a

solid friendship outside of the classroom. On our first day of class together this year, I

received a text that made my day– “I got your coffee.”

4. Volunteer together- I know what you’re thinking when you read the word volunteer–

SKIP. Hear me out! Nothing strengthens a friendship like being in an unfamiliar situation

together. You cling to each other, not knowing anyone else in the room. Every important

speech is somehow the funniest thing you’ve ever heard. There’s a different vibe about

doing something uncomfortable with someone you’re close to. Plus, you get to help

others in the process! Doing good feels good. If you and your roommate love dogs but

can’t have one in the dorm, volunteer for a local shelter together. Assemble boxes for the

food pantry. Read to children. These are all fond memories to reflect on after graduation.

5. Flowers aren’t only romantic- Buy people you love flowers!! With all floral shops

offering delivery, this becomes fairly easy. Or pick up a discounted bouquet at Kroger if

that’s your current bandwidth. Your roommate, professor, sister, and childhood best friend’s

mom would all appreciate flowers. If your friend just got her first professional job after

graduating, get flowers delivered to her office. There are even websites catered to this,

like Fresh Sends.

Pro Tip: Find a cute vase from Goodwill, add an endearing message to a blank card, add

flowers and you have an unforgettable gift.

6. Try a new place in town- Downtown Wilmington is the perfect place to feel like you’re

in a Hallmark town around the holidays with so many family-owned businesses. Grab

your besties and try a place you haven’t been before. Start with a treat from Bite Size

Market, then stroll down to the Banned Book Nook. From there you can explore the bike

trail beside Trail Haus. Make it an adventure by creating a Wilmington bucket list and

working with your friends to check it off by the end of the year.